At a lost~

Hmm..
a few days back..i felt kinda vulnerable
dunno y..jz felt lik i needed to rely on sum1..
needed sum1 to b there for me..
need sum care..
i hate feeling lik tht..coz it shows how useless i can b..
for some reason i never thought of relyin on ppl..
coz most of the time i can handle certain events..
n b capable..
it was jz an emo kinda day..
dunno if any1 felt lik tht too..
anyway..i will try my best nt to rely on ppl..
to do things on my own..
to be there for my family n friends..
i aint useless n i dun wanna be vulnerable..
i jz knw i can be stronger..
sumhow felt kinda confused..
its lik there's two sides in my head..one side sayin jz giv up..n say u can't do it
bt the other side is sayin..pick urself up n get going..no point waiting..move forward
ohh well..nw i feel much better..kinda wish there's a medication for when i'm down..
anti-depression medicine? haha
hmm..work has been great..time really fly fast~
n i got to knw more ppl d..feel more comfortable
compared to the first two days..scared n dunno any1 n dunno wad to do
everyday doin the same thing..dunno if this is my future goal anot oso..
havin second thoughts..bt since i've alrd chosen this path..no point turning back
move forward~
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another thing i wanna say~
lately my parents are plannin to move house..
well coz the cost of livin kinda high..n we all need our own space..
espcially me n my sis..away frm my bro..
bt my mom is such a perfectionist..everything has to be perfect..
the location, the design, the interior, the afternoon sun ~
haihhh..its been lik half a year d..n we're still stuck here..
at 1st was kinda excited..bt nw..alrd giv up on the idea..
hope to move soon..bt dun think will b so faz
o another thing..me n my sis moved to the extra room so we dun hav to deal
with tht *animal*
we jz go there sleep..coz really cant stand every nite wakin up in the middle of the nite
coz of the light and oso the *clickin* of the mouse..
its been great..every nite can sleep..pimples oso vanish d...
wonderful~ bt com still in his room haihhh!!!
need my own room~ mom n dad faster move house!!!
hahaha...okay
nitex~

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